The He(Art) of Listening

By Jessie May Wolfe

This year, what if we commit to being more of a heartfelt listener? Imagine the impact that would make, if we all just listened a little more.

Think about it…

We learn when we listen. We expand when we listen. To listen is to love and to lead.  We grow and create space for courageous conversations, the kind we all need right now, when we listen. And, peace of mind comes when we listen with our heart. 

The problem is that most people aren’t listening but merely waiting for their turn to speak (or talk over each other). So, we aren’t really hearing one another or honoring the kind of understanding that comes from deeply being with another.  

As we open up to this new year ahead with so much turbulence that surrounds us, deep heartfelt listening has never been more important. But, to truly be a heartfelt listener, you need to tune into yourself and what’s happening in your heart.

Listen with your heart rather than your head…

Where Do We Begin?

The shift from head to heart when listening is the key. So, start by creating a space to tune in and really listen. Your heart naturally has the capacity to recalibrate you and recognize your truth. And by space, I want you to pay attention to the mood, tone, and underlying energy of what is really being communicated beyond the words or what you’re thinking. 

Pay attention to what you feel (in your heart) rather than listening for what you’re used to hearing (in your head). 

The head keeps us in “autopilot listening” where we are subconsciously seeking things to validate what we already think.

When we are more present, we can anchor within and witness what comes our way instead of being so quick to judge.


Many of us live in the mind’s busy spin cycle. We are constantly over stressed and feeling stuck in that stress and negativity. I created HeartRise, a modern method of meditation and an empowering lifestyle, to change this. One way to start is our 4-step method that helps you to develop more heart-based listening. This is something you can apply every day. 

Step 1: SEE with Heart Vision

This means to observe what’s there without attaching meaning to it (HEAD).

Step 2: FEEL with Heart Focus

This is critical as it allows you to FEEL what’s there when you’re observing the trigger, behavior, idea, or circumstance that arises with your SEEing.

Step 3: FREE with Heart Knowing

This takes practice as it’s about letting go of what’s coming up with breath…moving through  the feelings to release them, and build the self-trust that it takes.

Step 4: FLOW with Heart Wisdom

This is where you really cultivate a deeper connection with Heartfelt listening. Once you’ve let go of what you’re holding, you’re that much more open to trust what’s coming up and through you. Again, with practice, you can build conviction and resilience so that your listening becomes more aligned with your truth rather than what you’ve been conditioned to think.


Flow is a way of living where synchronicity and resonance move you, and you can lean in to listen more clearly, and go deeper when needed. Your emotions are gifts of guidance that can help you to tune in. 

Instead of stuffing those feelings down and putting a brave face on, you can actually heal what you’ve been holding and listen more deeply by actually feeling your way through.

The heart is attuned to another frequency (literally, an electromagnetic field). It is an invisible language of vibes that we can pick up and be guided by when we’re present to the mood, the tone, and the texture of what’s really being said beyond the obvious words and cues.

Your feelings are energy wanting to be expressed when you learn how to safely experience them. With practice, it gets easier and your heart grows stronger. You can recognize and repurpose stuck energy (blocked emotions) as fuel.  


Think of your heart as your engine. Now, for a moment, consider what happens when you don’t “listen” to the engine to see how you may be operating. This is where the head keeps you busy—running on autopilot listening to all the “shoulds” that surround you, or worrying about what others think of you. That is completely exhausting and ineffective.  

Heartfelt listening gets you out of your busy head and into your knowing heart.  When you take the time to really listen to your own heart, you strengthen self-trust and reinforce your capacity to have compassion and understanding when listening to others.   

So, essentially, to be a better listener, you need to tune into yourself. You need to feel good within your heart so you can open yourself to hear others.


Take a moment now and place both hands over your heart. BREATHE. Take a long, expansive breath…in and out…through your heart. As you breathe, ask these questions: 

  • How connected do I feel? 
  • Am I listening to what’s here?  
  • What feeling is present that I’m not letting breathe? 
  • How can I connect and honor myself today? 
  • Where can I express love? 
  • What am I grateful for? 
  • How can I be more present and really listen to someone else today who I may not agree with? What can I appreciate in someone else today?  

As we cultivate the He(Art) of Listening in our own lives, we can embrace these times as the cue to remember the compassion and expansion we’re here to co-create. 

(photo credit: Shutterstock)

About Jessie May Wolfe
Jessie May is the founder of the HeartRise Movement. She empowers teams of creatives, entrepreneurs and executives around the world using the integration of the HeartRise Method.

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