How I Broke Up With Food Guilt and Started Loving My Body

Like most people born in the ’80s, I was a member of the clean plate club. I’d ask questions like “how many more bites?” and was always told to finish what was on my plate. My mother made sure that we had balanced meals consisting of protein and greens. I kept up my plate-cleaning practices as I got older, but as a young adult, that quickly meant lots of takeout, fast food, and microwave dinners—all things that have a place in a healthy non-restrictive diet, by the way. But those things became my diet. My eating habits didn’t change until I started working out in my late twenties. I was beginning to hear nutrition buzz words around the gym, like macros and BCAAs. Being too embarrassed to ask, I’d Google these new-to-me terms to figure out what they were. Slowly, I started thinking more about the food I was putting into my body. I lost around 40 pounds over the course of eight months by eating better and working out regularly. This interest in health eventually led me to a new career a few years later. As I transitioned out of working in mental health, I pursued further education in nutrition and health coaching. I’m now a holistic health coach with a practice focusing on women and families. (I’m Nutritious Life Certified, too!) Even still, I was constantly living in fear that I would fall back into my old habits. After living a mostly sedentary life, I was terrified I would lose my motivation and enjoyment of eating well and exercising regularly. I constantly looked at myself in the mirror. I scrutinized the roundness of my hips, measured various parts of my body, and chastised myself because the inches weren’t coming off. Then I got pregnant… I exercised throughout my pregnancy, but I really leaned into my carb-y cravings. I had gained weight in places I wasn’t expecting, and the weight didn’t fall off as easily as I had hoped. After I had my baby, I recorded my measurements on my bathroom mirror and took pictures of myself every single week. I’d cry and become angry when I didn’t hit my weight-loss goals, and I had a constant inner dialogue of self-harm and hate. Rationally, I knew that obsessing didn’t matter. I knew that the doughnut I had for breakfast wouldn’t cause me to spiral out of control. But I would still beat myself up about it afterward. Worse, it seemed that the more I learned about food and nutrition, the more extreme I became. I realized things were getting out of hand when I was about 24 weeks pregnant with my second son. I told myself that I was going to have a healthier pregnancy. Eat more vegetables but indulge consciously. And I was doing a really good job! I was indulging in extra calories, exercising, and enjoying a fair amount of fruits and vegetables. But I still had a full meltdown when I realized I was gaining more weight than I had anticipated. I was devastated. My turning point… I knew that my reaction was abnormal, so I reached out to a friend, who met my downward spiral with love and support. She gave me some amazing advice: don’t look at the scale. She reminded me of what I was carrying (my son!) and why I needed the weight. I already knew this, but I needed to hear it from someone else. After my pregnancy, I fell back into some of the same habits. But at some point, I just let it go. Diving further into my own wellness journey and seeing the cycle of body dysmorphia and obsessive control over my eating habits and size made me feel a bit ill. Seeking help from my friends, my doctor, and my therapist best friend helped me break the vicious cycle. I’d ask myself what I needed in the moment: water, food, rest? And if the answer was food, what kind of food? Of course, I still have times when I look in the mirror and chastise myself for not having the perfect body, but I don’t let it consume me. I share my feelings with someone, or just say them out loud and move forward. Every day, I work to focus on what I’m grateful for, how my body feels, and what my body and my heart need. And during pizza night, I focus more on the laughter and time I’m spending with my family than feelings of food guilt. I know everyone’s journey is different, and trust me, I’m still a work in progress, but self-acceptance is well worth the effort.  (Photo: Shutterstock)

Can You Be Body Positive and *Still* Want to Lose Weight?

By Keri Glassman, RD and founder of Nutritious Life The body positivity movement is in full force: The #bodypositive hashtag has been used over 11 million times on Instagram, and the shift inspired both designers and advertisers to cater to more diverse body types in their clothing and campaigns. With 30 million people suffering from an eating disorder in the U.S. alone, this is undeniably a good thing. We need to embrace our bodies, not shame them and wish they resembled the images we see in high-fashion ads. RELATED: 5 Common Myths About Eating Disorders Still, many people want to drop pounds with the support of their dietitian or health professional, and as one of those dietitians, I wholeheartedly support people in this endeavor. For those above a healthy weight, shedding pounds can undoubtedly improve markers of health, reducing their risk of heart disease and certain cancers, ultimately lengthening their lifespan. So yes, weight loss is a good thing for many people, but that doesn’t mean you need to abandon body positivity in the process. In fact, I’d argue that practicing more body-love can help you hit your weight loss goals.  How high self-esteem promotes healthy habits Research suggests that higher self-esteem may lead to healthier choices. A Pediatric Obesity study shows that kids who are bullied are more likely to gain weight. You might think teasing would be a motivator of sorts, eventually leading to weight loss…But the truth is, weight loss is so much more complicated than that. The authors note that body dissatisfaction may lead to unhealthy behaviors, like binge eating, and say that stress hormones might play a role too. (Of course, bullying has a slew of way more serious side effects, including self-harm and suicide.) I’d say the same reasoning also holds true for adults who are mean to themselves. Think about it: If you like and value someone, you’re more likely to treat them well, listen to them, and honor their needs, right? Well, the same goes for your body. The best weight loss plans emphasize making choices because you love your body, not because you hate it. It means saying no! to fad diets and starving yourself, and yes! to empowered eating and healthy foods that give you energy, the whole philosophy behind the Nutritious Life Eat Empowered pillar. RELATED: The Step-By-Step Guide to Mindful Eating You’re allowed to have complicated emotions about your body Look, our relationships with our bodies are complicated: One day we might love the way we look (say, after an empowering workout), and the next we might feel more meh (ahem, Day 1 of your period). That’s okay, and it’s all part of the process. It’s unrealistic to love the way you look every single day, but in your more negative moments, I hope you can embrace some more #bodyneutrality and practice forgiveness. Ultimately, it’s okay to make changes to your diet and exercise regimen—for health or for vanity—as long as you do it the healthy way. I don’t know about you, but I haven’t seen any body-positivity posts telling people to eat endless amounts of sugar and stop working out. Body positivity is about finding workouts you truly love, eating well, and being honest about your needs in the moment. It’s not about throwing your goals out the window. It’s about finding balance and being nice—and those are things we can all practice, weight loss goals or not. (Photo: Shutterstock)